Math Test - a poem.

I occasionally get requests to post guest pieces at RME, but invariably they prove to be from people looking to promote some sort of commercial web site or service. As those so requesting fail to offer to adequately grease my palm, I always refuse, sometimes in less than friendly fashion.

However, I received a work today of such outstanding literary merit, so fraught with relevance to many of the concerns of this blog, that I could not refuse despite the lack of financial incentives from the author.

For now, I am going to publish this without attribution to the author, though in due course his or her name will be appended in an updated version. I will state unequivocally that I am NOT the author, though I did, with permission, make one substantive change to improve a rhyme. It did not change the intended meaning, however.

The Math Test

by Zane Goldenberg Dietz

Oh no.
I'm screwed.
Why didn't I study?
I blankly stare at Question Three.
I feel it staring back at me.

I feel my heart pounding in my chest.
I despise this dumb algebra test.
I wonder how long it'll take
Before my hands begin to shake.

What could the answer be?
Is it "line of symmetry"?

Y is ᴨ so complex?

Polynomial? More like "Idunnomial."

Who ever cared about 2x^2?

Calculus is ridiculus.

Geometry makes me vomitry.

Why is tangent so abhorrent?

And I'm not fanatical about that radical.

Then, it hits me.
The answer to Three.
I let out a big sigh.
The answer all along was blueberry ᴨ.